Friday, 5 June 2009

And the winner is...?

'And now,' said Bertha, 'the marks from Cyril.'

Cyril held up a number and Norma made a careful note of it.

'And now,' said Bertha again, 'the marks from Annie.'

Annie held up several numbers and fell backwards into the sea.

'Which one of those are we counting?' asked Captain Bill.

'All of them,' replied Norma.

'All of them!' exclaimed Captain Bill.

'We have to,' replied Bertha, 'it's in her contract.'

'I've got a long term contract,' said Annie as Cyril helped her back on board.

'And finally,' concluded Bertha, 'the marks from Horace.'

Norma gave Horace a nudge and Horace held up a hat box lid with writing on it.

'What's that?' asked Bertha.

'It's a poem,' replied Horace, '...that is what you wanted wasn't it?'

'Hopeless!' muttered Captain Bill, 'absolutely hopeless!'

Norma explained to Horace that he was supposed to be giving marks for the 'name our boat' competition and everyone waited while Horace had a look at the entries and gave his score. Then Norma added everything up and put the results into a gold envelope, which she gave to Bertha.

'I now call upon Captain Bill to read out the results,' said Bertha and Captain Bill did his best to climb onto the hat boxes with Bertha.

'Thank you,' he said, 'I shall now read the results in reverse order...' and he opened the envelope.

'In 3rd place, from Ms Armenoioioioio 'Annieee's Dream',' and everyone gave a little round of applause.

'In 2nd place, from Ms Enormous Moose...' and here Bertha interrupted Captain Bill.

'Sorry,' he continued, 'from Ms Ann O Nemus 'Heifer's Pickle',' and everyone gave another - slightly larger - round of applause.

'And finally, in 1st place, from Ms Felt, the winner is 'The Mootilus'.'

And everyone gave a very large round of applause.

'Shouldn't I have something to hit against the side of the ship?' asked Captain Bill.

And Cyril held up Horace.

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