Wednesday, 17 June 2009
how to practice for a regatta
'Hopeless,' said Captain Bill, 'absolutely hopeless!'
'It wasn't our fault!' shouted back Bertha.
'Well you're not blaming me!' replied Captain Bill, 'I've got enough problems as it is. It's alright for you lot, out there in your boat, rowing away nineteen to the dozen....I have to run along the river bank and look at you at the same time.....4 trees and an equerry I've run into so far this morning.'
'Was he alright?' asked Norma.
'Difficult to tell,' replied Captain Bill, 'all I could see was his little arms thrashing away in the water...his hat floating off downstream in the dawn's early light, the sun glinting off the gold braid. Anyway, if he couldn't swim he shouldn't have been standing so close to the edge. But the point is,' he continued, 'this isn't my fault. I distinctly called out 'turn to port' and you lot veered off to the left!'
'THAT IS PORT!' mooed Bertha.
'Is it?' replied Captain Bill, 'have they changed it again? I do wish they wouldn't keep doing that. It's hardly surprising that a person gets confused when they won't leave things alone.'
'Look,' called down Norma, 'we can sort that all out later on. Right now I think we should concentrate on getting us down.'
'Well,' said Bertha, 'I think the first thing that needs to happen is for Captain Bill to move a bit closer.'
'Why?' asked Norma.
'So I can hit him with my paddle,' replied Bertha.