Saturday, 27 March 2010

how to get a perfect figure

'And so,'began Captain Bill,'as you can see, following on from my tip top command captainy decision the ship has executed an almost perfect figure of eighty three and a half!'

'Eighty three and a half?' questioned Admiral Cholmondley Waldgrave St Clair.

'Yes,' replied captain Bill and here he leaned towards to the Admiral and slightly lowered his voice.

'To tell you the truth the half was a bit of a mistake, only young Geraldine thought we'd finished and decided to do a little dance without realising that Norma was still following her flag signals. Still,' he continued raising his voice back to it's normal level,'no harm done, ship still on the correct side of the watery bit! So is that it then? All finished? Time to go home?'

'Almost,' replied the Admiral.

'Almost?' said Captain Bill.

'Well,' said the Admiral,'the original complaint was about damaging a harbour wall. So now you've finished 'sailing about a bit' your ship needs to go into your harbour!'

'Right,' gulped Captain Bill,'any chance a quick lay down in a darkened room first?'

But there wasn't.

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