Thursday, 23 January 2014

Hornpipe dancer at your disposal



'It's genuine,' mooed Norma, 'apparently she's been studying for a while now.'

'But!' said Captain Bill.

'And she finished top of her class.'

'But!' said Captain Bill.

'Very straight hat!' observed Bertha.

'I thought that,' replied Norma. 'I think it's so nice when someone achieves something.'

'But!' said Captain Bill.

'And she got special mentions for navigation, deck ironing and hornpipe dancing.'  added Norma.

And on cue Geraldine performed a particularly fine hornpipe.

'Didn't you fail hornpipe?' asked Bertha.

'It wasn't an essential!' replied Captain Bill. 'There were far more important things. Anyway, I dare say it's a heck of a lot easier when you've only got two legs. You try doing it with four hooves in a Force Eight. They should never have gone ahead with it under those conditions. I could easily have lost a horn.'

'Still,' said Norma, 'the fact is we all have to accept that Geraldine is now a fully fledged...'

'Top of her class,' added Bertha.

'...ship's captain.' finished Norma.

'Changes nothing!' mooed Captain Bill. '...I was here first!'

'Well I see it as a positive thing,' said Norma. 'From now on, if you're not sure about something, you can ask for a second opinion.'

'I get those anyway,' replied Captain Bill, 'without having to ask. And what I really don't understand is how she got onto the course in the first place.'

'I suppose she just applied like anyone else,' said Norma.

'But it's not that simple,' replied Captain Bill. 'You can't just get on. You have to have a background in captaining to be considered. It took me years. You have to work your way towards it. The only way you can shortcut the procedure is if you get the signatures of at least half...of...your...ship's........crew!!!!'

1 comment:

Armenoi said...

Ha, ha, ha. He get's there eventually.
Congratulations Captain Geraldine.