Friday, 17 January 2014

Knitted compass mending is a skill

'I'm sure I've got some thread here that's the right colour,' said Norma, 'and you think you've got a problem with one of the 'n's as well?'

'Yes,' replied Captain Bill and he held up his knitted compass and pointed at an N that had come loose.

'I really aught to knit you another one some time,' said Norma.

'I'm fine with this one,' replied Captain Bill.

'But at least then you'd have a spare,' said Norma. 'I've seen some lovely designs. More modern.'

Captain Bill looked slightly uneasy.

'I've still got the old pattern,' added Norma.

Captain Bill looked relieved.

'Found it!' mooed Norma and she held up a reel of deep rose coloured thread. 'Now which needle?'

Captain Bill was about to feel faint at the mention of the word 'needle' when he was distracted by the arrival of Bertha.

'Right,' she began, 'I've drawn up a manifest of what needs loading and I've had a look, there shouldn't be any problems with the Pickled Heifer, it seems seaworthy enough.'

'I rather resent the implication that it wouldn't be,' replied Captain Bill. 'I do make regular tours of inspection you know...while other people are busy...running their one book library.'

Bertha and Captain Bill stared at each other.

'I just thought I'd check!' whispered Bertha.

'Well there was no need to,' replied Captain Bill. 'Everything has been thought of, decks ironed, sails polished, rope..checked for ropeness, the circular turny thing...'

'Wheel,' said Norma.

'That as well,' continued Captain Bill, 'is....turny steery. So I think you'll find all we need to do is load the chest and we can be away. The High Seas beckon! Your much criticised Captain, has it seems, thought of everything!'

'Fine!' said Bertha, '..............Just one question.'

'Mmm?' said Captain Bill.

'Where are we actually sailing to?'

1 comment:

Armenoi said...

It seems a shame to cover up those pretty little boats on his scarf with a tatty compass. I was going to suggest he navigate with them but they appear to be going in opposite directions...