Monday, 27 January 2014
There is no steering committee
'I just thought it would be a conciliatory gesture,' said Norma.
'Which would be more than the sort of gesture that I'm regularly used to receiving,' replied Captain Bill. 'Did you know there was list?'
'I had heard mention of it,' conceded Norma. 'Apparently number 47 is rather unfair.'
'And that makes it OK then I suppose.'
'None of this is her fault,' continued Norma, 'and she has steered before.'
'Possible she has,' replied Captain Bill, 'but I, as the recognised captain, will make the decisions...If I'm still allowed?'
Norma came up the last stair and stood by Captain Bill.
'I think I might stay,' she said.
'Stay here,' replied Norma. 'Stay here and let you all sail away and look after yourselves. Bertha is 1st Mate you know. You should be talking to her about this. I could sit on the beach and get some knitting done.'
'...................................................No you wouldn't!'
'Oh yes I would,' mooed Norma.
'Look, I don't see how I can be blamed for any of this,' replied Captain Bill. 'You don't realise the pressure I'm under. Captaining is no jog along the gangplank of life you know. Hardly a moment goes by without me having to make a life or death decision and do I ever get thanked for it?'
'I'm sure it can't be easy,' said Norma.
'No it isn't!' replied Captain Bill. 'Now...is everything ready for the off?'
'Everything is loaded, including the chest. Everyone is aboard and we're ready to depart the harbour.'
'Fine!' said Captain Bill. 'If the crew could take their places.'
'And is Geraldine steering?'
'No!' replied Captain Bill.
'So you want me to?' asked Norma.
'No!' replied Captain Bill. 'Clearly it's become a matter of some importance that I demonstrate my fitness to command. So I shall steer!'
And Norma thought very seriously about getting off.