Monday, 24 March 2014

Who lives in a cabin like this?

'It''s huge!!!' exclaimed Captain Bill.

'It's not bad,' replied Cyril.

'It must run the entire length of the ship!'

'Errrrrr, possibly,' said Cyril. 'Can't say I've ever measured it.'

'But I've only got a tiny room!' mooed Captain Bill.

'It's all you need really,' replied Cyril. 'This place is a burden.'

'I've just worked it out!' continued Captain Bill. 'We must be in the hold!

'Might be,' replied Cyril.

'Well it certainly explains why we can never carry much cargo...and you've taken all the ballast out.'

'I'm down here most of the time,' replied Cyril. 'It's pretty much the same thing.'

'Is that a jacuzzi?' asked Horace.

'Where?' said Captain Bill.

'Next to the billiards table,' replied Horace, 'behind that large marble sculpture.'

'Hardly ever use it,' said Cyril. 'I find the walk in shower far more convenient. I should get it taken out but I've only just had the carpet laid.'

'It looks like real grass?' mooed Horace.

'I tried that,' replied Cyril. 'Didn't work. I'd have had to knock through to the deck to get the natural light.'

'And you didn't?' asked Captain Bill.

'Would have created a lot of dust,' replied Cyril. 'So I compromised.'

'So what is it?' asked Horace.

'Silk,' replied Cyril. 'Well it's a sort of silk, cashmere blend with some other stuff thrown in...I think it works quite well considering. It's very soft on the hoof. I hardly ever have to put the underfloor heating on.'

'I'm not sure I can take this all in,' said Captain Bill.

'If it's too much for you I can always take you back up in the lift?'

'..........................On second thoughts,' mooed Captain Bill.


Armenoi said...

I just love the idea of Cyril being ballast - priceless.
Silk and cashmere blend, you say? Very wise. No static to ignite the gunpowder. Oh cannon, I wondered why...

Armenoi said...

Hmm. I don't recognise the bovine in the photograph, is it family? I do, however, recognise the landscarperist!

Steve Allender said...

I think the photo is a 'selfie'. Cyril on the right and Annie on the left. I couldn't possibly comment on the painting.