Friday, 3 June 2016

Warning! Profits reversing.


'Why yes, my petite chums,' Camille replied, 'in a deliberately overlong and complex exposition made for the benefit of newer readers I can confirm that when we last parted company myself and ma little students were about to embark on running a combined vineyard and prison for notorious pirates.'

'So what happened?' Bertha asked.

'We 'ad considerable success with the Pinot but I never felt we got the soil right for a truly world class Chablis.'

'...................................................................And the prison?' said Norma.

'At first things went well, although there were fewer transferable skills from pirating into viticulture than I 'ad 'oped. But they applied themselves to the tasks I set them and exhibited a strong team spirit that was a credit to their evil brotherhood.'

'But I sense a 'but',' Bertha mooed.

'Indeed! For although they worked 'ard they also 'ighlighted ma failure to implement minimum 'ealth and safety standards. I found myself 'emmed in by new rules and regulations. There could be no more running with pointy vines. Safety goggles 'ad to be worn at all times. New signs were ordered saying 'Caution, slippery grape skins'. A minimum of three high vis jackets per person, even in good weather, crippled their productivity. The cart 'ad to be fitted with a recorded announcement saying, 'Warning, vehicle reversing' even when it was obvious which direction it was moving in. It was the classic tale of the struggle between free enterprise and the bureaucratic intervention of workers rights set within the cartoon cow/sheep/pirate context with which we are all so familiar.'

'Oh! How often have we witnessed that!' said Bertha.

And Camille, Norma and Bertha all sighed. 

'So what did you do?' Norma asked.

1 comment:

Gina said...

Bwahahahaha.....can't wait to read this to hubby :D XXX